Hiya! Take a break from your busy day and laugh
at, empathize with, contemplate, these witty and profound Quips (up first) and
Quotes (scroll below) from friendly 39ers, Internet roaming, and my wandering
mind.
Quips – Aging with Wit
A
reporter asked the late Lionel Barrymore if he still found acting as much fun
as it used to be. “Look, son, I’m 75 years old,” Barrymore snorted. “Nothing is
as much fun as it used to be.”
~
Jim Lowe in “My Favorite Jokes” Parade,
1971
Don’t
worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you.
~
Joey Adams*
I’m
too old to be governed by fear of dumb people.
~
Rochelle quote from a 2012 TV show or movie … don’t
recall what, but reminds me of politics
I
was always taught to respect my elders and I’ve now reached the age when I don’t
have anybody to respect.
~
George Burns*, actor; at age 94
Old
people shouldn’t eat health foods. They need all the preservatives they can
get.
~
Robert Orben*, comedy writer; speech writer for Gerald R. Ford
The
secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly … and lie about your
age.
~
Lucille Ball
Aging is an extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been.
~ David Bowie
Aging is an extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been.
~ David Bowie
Why
did the old lady put wheels on her rocking chair? She wanted to rock and roll!
~
From Free
Funny Jokes
You
know you’re getting old when it takes longer to rest than to get tired.
~
Jim Lowe in “My Favorite Jokes” Parade,
1971
You
know you’re getting older, when Happy Hour is a nap!
~
Another age-old tavern quote
>><<>><<
Quotes – Life, Plain
& Simple
The
Difference between life and the movies is that a script has to make sense. Life
doesn’t.
~
Joseph L. Mankiewicz*, film director, writer, producer
Experience
is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterward.
~
Vernon Law, Pittsburgh Pirates retired baseball pitcher (1950-1967)
I
respectfully decline the invitation to join your hallucination.
and
…
One
“oh shit” can erase a thousand attaboys.
~
Scott Adams, Dilbert cartoonist.
I
want to be more than I am, but I don’t know how.
~
Rockford Files: A Blessing in Disguise,
1995 TV movie
If
a thing is old, it is a sign that it was fit to live. The guarantee of
continuity is quality.
~
Eddie Rickenbacker*, America’s most successful fighter ace in WWI
If
life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then let’s all get wasted
together and have the time of our lives!
~
Another age-old tavern quote
Life
should be a little nuts, otherwise it’s just a bunch of Thursdays strung
together …”
~
From movie, Rumor Has It, with
Jennifer Aniston
Life
will never be perfect, so we must learn how to make the imperfections work for
us.
~
Rochelle, 1997
Some
people take the bull by the horns – others just shoot it.
~
Jim Lowe, New York DJ, in “My Favorite Jokes” Parade, 1971
Sometimes
I open my mouth and things come out that I didn’t even know were in there …
~
Ben Matlock; Matlock rerun, WGN-TV, 2002
What
lies behind us and what lies before us are tiny matters compared to what lies
within us.
~
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Who
is more foolish – the fool, or the fool who follows him?
~
Star Wars (movie)
With
enough courage you can do without a reputation.
~
from Gone With
the Wind; Rhett Butler
*Culled
from The Quotable Quote Book by
Merrit Malloy & Shauna Sorensen, 1990
